10.03.04 - 11:38 AM, Denver, CO
LUNCH
DINNER
10.03.2004
10.02.2004
10.02.04 - 11:48 AM, Denver, Colorado
The Kansas City show was kind of weird. It was in a building where the cats appeared to have taken over the place. I thought it was an awesome venue at first but then when I walked around the town and saw that everything had been closed for what seemed like YEARS I started to become a little wary. The only thing open was the gay bar next door where James Lynch and James Brown told JT and I we could get a free shot 'cause we were playing next door. Turns out this was just a trick to make straight people go into a gay bar. Whoop-de-shit. The bartender understood and gave us our shots for free and I got to watch the debates with a bunch of people who had a LOT invested in the outcome of this election. I cracked open my can of Bush's Baked Beans and the bartender (nicest dude ever) gave me plastic forks and chips to dip in the beans. Everyone in that bar was real nice but once the debates were done I figured I should take my can of baked beans back to the show.
We got onto the stage and after the first two songs we realized that the vocals just weren't working very well. Turns out the PA blew, like, immediately so it was a very strange show filled with us trying to play but not quite pulling it off. When the night ended we had a chromatic tuner stolen from us which if any of you guys see it, PLEASE notify us so we can get it back. We are doing the rest of our tour out of tune if you do not.
We went to waffle house where my mixture of whiskey and beans exacted its revenge. Then we got a motel with James Brown and slept like fuckin' babies/took their pillows in the morning. When we woke up I realized that my legs and arms didn't work anymore. James Lynch later informed me that he thought it'd be funny if he didn't tell me to stretch before going on the jet-ski and get me really freaked out 'cause my legs didn't work. I suppose it was.
IF ANYONE HAS NEVER DRIVEN ACROSS THE STATE OF KANSAS HERE IS AN ACCURATE DESCRIPTION OF IT:
I expected at some point to see a car or a building or SOMETHING. But there wasn't SHIT. Even the exits we pulled off at because there were signs for gas, the gas stations had been abandoned and broken. After a 9 hour drive of nothing at all (except the gas station that gave us free popcorn with a fill up in Colorado), we got to the 15th Street Tavern and they told us we all got a free pitcher each. The thing I forgot though is that you get fucked up waaaay quicker when you're in Colorado because you are a mile-high and the air is way thinner up here. Needless to say, I wore a dress on stage and tore it off mid song and played in my underwear. It was kind of a strange night being that it was a twenty-one and up crowd, but we still had a blast. We stayed at Belfast Carbomb's house and I realized this after stumbling out of the van this morning, well-rested and hangover-free but still broken-legged.
The Kansas City show was kind of weird. It was in a building where the cats appeared to have taken over the place. I thought it was an awesome venue at first but then when I walked around the town and saw that everything had been closed for what seemed like YEARS I started to become a little wary. The only thing open was the gay bar next door where James Lynch and James Brown told JT and I we could get a free shot 'cause we were playing next door. Turns out this was just a trick to make straight people go into a gay bar. Whoop-de-shit. The bartender understood and gave us our shots for free and I got to watch the debates with a bunch of people who had a LOT invested in the outcome of this election. I cracked open my can of Bush's Baked Beans and the bartender (nicest dude ever) gave me plastic forks and chips to dip in the beans. Everyone in that bar was real nice but once the debates were done I figured I should take my can of baked beans back to the show.
We got onto the stage and after the first two songs we realized that the vocals just weren't working very well. Turns out the PA blew, like, immediately so it was a very strange show filled with us trying to play but not quite pulling it off. When the night ended we had a chromatic tuner stolen from us which if any of you guys see it, PLEASE notify us so we can get it back. We are doing the rest of our tour out of tune if you do not.
We went to waffle house where my mixture of whiskey and beans exacted its revenge. Then we got a motel with James Brown and slept like fuckin' babies/took their pillows in the morning. When we woke up I realized that my legs and arms didn't work anymore. James Lynch later informed me that he thought it'd be funny if he didn't tell me to stretch before going on the jet-ski and get me really freaked out 'cause my legs didn't work. I suppose it was.
IF ANYONE HAS NEVER DRIVEN ACROSS THE STATE OF KANSAS HERE IS AN ACCURATE DESCRIPTION OF IT:
I expected at some point to see a car or a building or SOMETHING. But there wasn't SHIT. Even the exits we pulled off at because there were signs for gas, the gas stations had been abandoned and broken. After a 9 hour drive of nothing at all (except the gas station that gave us free popcorn with a fill up in Colorado), we got to the 15th Street Tavern and they told us we all got a free pitcher each. The thing I forgot though is that you get fucked up waaaay quicker when you're in Colorado because you are a mile-high and the air is way thinner up here. Needless to say, I wore a dress on stage and tore it off mid song and played in my underwear. It was kind of a strange night being that it was a twenty-one and up crowd, but we still had a blast. We stayed at Belfast Carbomb's house and I realized this after stumbling out of the van this morning, well-rested and hangover-free but still broken-legged.
9.30.2004
10.30.2004: 7:47 PM, Kansas City, MO
These things get worse and worse as I continuosly forget to update them. so let's do it kinda right.
COVINGTON, KY: A very weird show. We showed up and we had heard the night before through our message board that the Rebels weren't playing. After getting out of extended area I heard that Rylan had left me a message a few days earlier citing van trouble as the reason they would be missing the shows. After a phone call and angry message, Rylan quickly called back and explained their side of the story and that they were sorry and so on and so forth and he really meant it and we all decided that we don't want to be pissed at each other and shit happens and whatever we heard from whoever we heard it from or whatever... people misunderstand things. Shit happens. The Rebels would be posting something within the coming days and things would be fine. Great. Cool.
But, fuck! We still had the show at hand in Cincinatti where kids would be expecting the Rebels. I was a tad worried, but we had played Radio Down a bunch of times. Our friend Jeff was supposed to take us out on the town in Cincinatti and get us trashed, but he had left his ID at home. Thankfully though, there were drink tickets available for us.
And that's where our mistake began. You see, last time we were there, our friend Jeff had bought me a pitcher right before we played and I was in a bad mood so I downed in and it was one of our best shows ever. This time, there were like 20 kids there when we started drinking so we were a little depressed about the turn out. But then, lo and behold, there were fucking TONS of kids there. I guess we got too caught up in our alcohol to notice it. By the time we went on, we was DRIZZUNK and didn't know what was going on. After a few songs we caught on, but, boy that was scary as shit. We played almost every song we know how to play now, so it was a blast.
Jeff took us out on the town later on that night and we went to a bar that was full of people shouting "get her done" so I made my way to the Shell station to take a shit and then to the van to catch up on some writing. When everyone came out they were shouting crazy things like "YOU DON'T GOT NO LEGS" and "MY TIRE'S FLAT" [pantomime blowjob]. It was my night to drive so sober as sober people are I made my way out to Iowa.
We hit 100,000 miles on our van during this trip. We celebrated by cracking a bottle of whiskey on the side of the interstate. I love whiskey.
IOWA: Who would have known that there was anything to do in Iowa? Not us. Today was our laundry day and if any of you guys can even picture what a small vehicle would smell and look like with trash and dirty clothes from six messy individuals then you'll know that this was a fuckin' process and a half. We hung out in Iowa City for many hours in total disbelief that Iowa actually has a population that is about three.
Enough about laundry... we eventually ended up in Des Moines Iowa where we were greeted with a smile and such friendliness that we were surprised that three hours later we all had about five rounds in us that we didn't pay for. Iowa was such a great town and it was such a shock to us that there were actually kids there. And since the River City Rebels couldn't play they got a band called the Round City Rivals. Or something like that. I was drunk so I forgot.
MISSOURI: James Lynch drove through the night to the Ozarks in Eldon, MO to meet up with our close friend James Brown who is the singer of Lynch's band Beret!. Brown showed us the greatest time of our lives in the Lake of the Ozarks at about 9:00 in the morning... a time which we usually describe as not the greatest time of our lives. He gave us a boat and two jet-skiis from his dad's marina and just threw us out in the lake. Jet-skiing is so much fun and it's way easy to hurt yourself so it's EXTREME TOO!!!!! We had water-skiis and kneeboards too which JT used to show everyone his real skill, watersports. Unfortunately towards the end of the day, Mike's jet-ski stalled and he got stuck way out in this lake and we had to tow him back. Good-bye fun, hello KANSAS CITY!
We have yet to play here yet but the venue is called the stray cat because it is FULL OF CATS! AND THE CATS PEE EVERYWHERE. This is what rock and roll is.
These things get worse and worse as I continuosly forget to update them. so let's do it kinda right.
COVINGTON, KY: A very weird show. We showed up and we had heard the night before through our message board that the Rebels weren't playing. After getting out of extended area I heard that Rylan had left me a message a few days earlier citing van trouble as the reason they would be missing the shows. After a phone call and angry message, Rylan quickly called back and explained their side of the story and that they were sorry and so on and so forth and he really meant it and we all decided that we don't want to be pissed at each other and shit happens and whatever we heard from whoever we heard it from or whatever... people misunderstand things. Shit happens. The Rebels would be posting something within the coming days and things would be fine. Great. Cool.
But, fuck! We still had the show at hand in Cincinatti where kids would be expecting the Rebels. I was a tad worried, but we had played Radio Down a bunch of times. Our friend Jeff was supposed to take us out on the town in Cincinatti and get us trashed, but he had left his ID at home. Thankfully though, there were drink tickets available for us.
And that's where our mistake began. You see, last time we were there, our friend Jeff had bought me a pitcher right before we played and I was in a bad mood so I downed in and it was one of our best shows ever. This time, there were like 20 kids there when we started drinking so we were a little depressed about the turn out. But then, lo and behold, there were fucking TONS of kids there. I guess we got too caught up in our alcohol to notice it. By the time we went on, we was DRIZZUNK and didn't know what was going on. After a few songs we caught on, but, boy that was scary as shit. We played almost every song we know how to play now, so it was a blast.
Jeff took us out on the town later on that night and we went to a bar that was full of people shouting "get her done" so I made my way to the Shell station to take a shit and then to the van to catch up on some writing. When everyone came out they were shouting crazy things like "YOU DON'T GOT NO LEGS" and "MY TIRE'S FLAT" [pantomime blowjob]. It was my night to drive so sober as sober people are I made my way out to Iowa.
We hit 100,000 miles on our van during this trip. We celebrated by cracking a bottle of whiskey on the side of the interstate. I love whiskey.
IOWA: Who would have known that there was anything to do in Iowa? Not us. Today was our laundry day and if any of you guys can even picture what a small vehicle would smell and look like with trash and dirty clothes from six messy individuals then you'll know that this was a fuckin' process and a half. We hung out in Iowa City for many hours in total disbelief that Iowa actually has a population that is about three.
Enough about laundry... we eventually ended up in Des Moines Iowa where we were greeted with a smile and such friendliness that we were surprised that three hours later we all had about five rounds in us that we didn't pay for. Iowa was such a great town and it was such a shock to us that there were actually kids there. And since the River City Rebels couldn't play they got a band called the Round City Rivals. Or something like that. I was drunk so I forgot.
MISSOURI: James Lynch drove through the night to the Ozarks in Eldon, MO to meet up with our close friend James Brown who is the singer of Lynch's band Beret!. Brown showed us the greatest time of our lives in the Lake of the Ozarks at about 9:00 in the morning... a time which we usually describe as not the greatest time of our lives. He gave us a boat and two jet-skiis from his dad's marina and just threw us out in the lake. Jet-skiing is so much fun and it's way easy to hurt yourself so it's EXTREME TOO!!!!! We had water-skiis and kneeboards too which JT used to show everyone his real skill, watersports. Unfortunately towards the end of the day, Mike's jet-ski stalled and he got stuck way out in this lake and we had to tow him back. Good-bye fun, hello KANSAS CITY!
We have yet to play here yet but the venue is called the stray cat because it is FULL OF CATS! AND THE CATS PEE EVERYWHERE. This is what rock and roll is.
9.27.2004
9.27.2004 - Peoria, IL 6:31 PM
Yesterday was our last gig with the I Voted For Kodos band in Madison, Wisconsin and we're definitely gonna miss those dudes. It was a great show at the campus of UW where we were given all the amenities. Wireless internet. Location of stamps. Cupcakes. And one of the best ska bands I've ever seen.
In the middle of booking shows for the rest of this tour, I walked into the main room where the bands were playing and the Debonaires were on. Tight horn section, incredible singer, just fucking grooving all night long and unfortunately a lot of kids didn't go in for it. For those who did, it was a treat. I suggest you guys check this band out.
Our set was a lot of fun because kids were definitely enjoying themselves with these songs that they had never heard before. We had members of Taj Motel Trio and Debonaires up with us during a couple of songs and the guys from I Voted For Kodos attacked us at the end of their set with whipped cream and chocolate syrup. We retaliated with broken up Oriental flavored Ramen during their set which worked out great because they were so sweaty and wet that the seasoning stuck to them and they all smelled like soup for the remainder of the night. There was also the two girls who kept attempting to touch my penis while we played which was kinda weird, so I handed the cock-handling off to James at that point.
Soaked in sweat and soup, we bid our farewells to the Debonaires and the Taj Motel Trio (who are also a really good band) and went to this bar called the Stadium and there weren't too many people there, and this was genereally the theme of the night. I ordered cheese curds [note: if you ever go to wisconsin and you don't eat the cheese curds, kill yourself because you already missed out on life.] which i thought were $3.50 but were actually $6. I even ordered two 'cause i thought they were so cheap. Let's do the math:
I WANT CHEESE CURDS - $3.50 THAT'S NOT BAD!
JAMES WANTS CHEESE CURDS TOO, I SAY I'LL SPOT HIM - $7.00 PLUS TIP... UH-OH. This is getting a tad pricy, but whatever, i won't be back in wisconsin for a while
I MISREAD THE CHEESE CURDS PRICE - $6.00 X 2 = $12.00 PLUS TIP!!! OH FUCK! I just blew all my money.
SOLUTION = Leave without paying the tab for the curds.
This was also the first time we ordered like way too many pitchers at last call, so we all had to down a couple of pints before stumbling over to somewhere on State Street to drink again. Dave put on some Otis Redding so the bartender cranked it. Then told us we had five more minutes and James, being the only real drinker apparently amongst those of us who were there, drank 5 beers way less than an hour. We were trashed and had to break back into Troy from IV4K's place. For some reason there is this cat at Troy's place and I still don't understand the background story, but cats love to go out of their way to piss me off. This cat was jumping all over my computer while I was in the bathroom, the only place I was getting service. Then when I moved back into the main room, he started climbing on my face and hands, et cetera. After I managed to get it to go away, it came back while I was sleeping and meowed in my ears for about an hour. To a drunk/hungover guy, that's no fun. We were woken up early in the morning by the dude who used to live there. He threw us out early and we had to get out before any of us had time to shower. Then he asked us to help him move out as long as we were awake. Worst.
The drive to Peoria, IL was full of dead corn and cows. When cows lay down does that mean they are dead? Because I've seen a lot of lying down cows that a couple of cows seemed to be playing with on the drive down today, which is pretty boring if you're reading it, but pretty exciting if all you've been doing is looking at green patch after green patch after brown patch after green patch. There are also a lot of seemingly man-made lakes in Illinois, I guess you put those in on a farm instead of a pool.
So we just got to the venue and there's wi-fi which means we all get to avoid everyone else which is the exact antithesis of the point of touring, but fuck it. We're all about the computers. The coffeehouse we are playing tonight is tiny tiny tiny and there are seats and tables, so I'm not really sure what we're gonna do. Probably rock those tables to the ground.
Yesterday was our last gig with the I Voted For Kodos band in Madison, Wisconsin and we're definitely gonna miss those dudes. It was a great show at the campus of UW where we were given all the amenities. Wireless internet. Location of stamps. Cupcakes. And one of the best ska bands I've ever seen.
In the middle of booking shows for the rest of this tour, I walked into the main room where the bands were playing and the Debonaires were on. Tight horn section, incredible singer, just fucking grooving all night long and unfortunately a lot of kids didn't go in for it. For those who did, it was a treat. I suggest you guys check this band out.
Our set was a lot of fun because kids were definitely enjoying themselves with these songs that they had never heard before. We had members of Taj Motel Trio and Debonaires up with us during a couple of songs and the guys from I Voted For Kodos attacked us at the end of their set with whipped cream and chocolate syrup. We retaliated with broken up Oriental flavored Ramen during their set which worked out great because they were so sweaty and wet that the seasoning stuck to them and they all smelled like soup for the remainder of the night. There was also the two girls who kept attempting to touch my penis while we played which was kinda weird, so I handed the cock-handling off to James at that point.
Soaked in sweat and soup, we bid our farewells to the Debonaires and the Taj Motel Trio (who are also a really good band) and went to this bar called the Stadium and there weren't too many people there, and this was genereally the theme of the night. I ordered cheese curds [note: if you ever go to wisconsin and you don't eat the cheese curds, kill yourself because you already missed out on life.] which i thought were $3.50 but were actually $6. I even ordered two 'cause i thought they were so cheap. Let's do the math:
I WANT CHEESE CURDS - $3.50 THAT'S NOT BAD!
JAMES WANTS CHEESE CURDS TOO, I SAY I'LL SPOT HIM - $7.00 PLUS TIP... UH-OH. This is getting a tad pricy, but whatever, i won't be back in wisconsin for a while
I MISREAD THE CHEESE CURDS PRICE - $6.00 X 2 = $12.00 PLUS TIP!!! OH FUCK! I just blew all my money.
SOLUTION = Leave without paying the tab for the curds.
This was also the first time we ordered like way too many pitchers at last call, so we all had to down a couple of pints before stumbling over to somewhere on State Street to drink again. Dave put on some Otis Redding so the bartender cranked it. Then told us we had five more minutes and James, being the only real drinker apparently amongst those of us who were there, drank 5 beers way less than an hour. We were trashed and had to break back into Troy from IV4K's place. For some reason there is this cat at Troy's place and I still don't understand the background story, but cats love to go out of their way to piss me off. This cat was jumping all over my computer while I was in the bathroom, the only place I was getting service. Then when I moved back into the main room, he started climbing on my face and hands, et cetera. After I managed to get it to go away, it came back while I was sleeping and meowed in my ears for about an hour. To a drunk/hungover guy, that's no fun. We were woken up early in the morning by the dude who used to live there. He threw us out early and we had to get out before any of us had time to shower. Then he asked us to help him move out as long as we were awake. Worst.
The drive to Peoria, IL was full of dead corn and cows. When cows lay down does that mean they are dead? Because I've seen a lot of lying down cows that a couple of cows seemed to be playing with on the drive down today, which is pretty boring if you're reading it, but pretty exciting if all you've been doing is looking at green patch after green patch after brown patch after green patch. There are also a lot of seemingly man-made lakes in Illinois, I guess you put those in on a farm instead of a pool.
So we just got to the venue and there's wi-fi which means we all get to avoid everyone else which is the exact antithesis of the point of touring, but fuck it. We're all about the computers. The coffeehouse we are playing tonight is tiny tiny tiny and there are seats and tables, so I'm not really sure what we're gonna do. Probably rock those tables to the ground.
9.26.2004
University of Wisconsin, Madison, WI - 6:37 PM
Wow... what a strange past couple of days. This can't really get too long because I have to play in about an hour so here's what has happened.
- Troy from IV4K is easily nicer than anyone we have ever met. He let us stay in his house, took us out to bars and gave me his 7-layer burrito to name a couple of the wonderful things he's done!
- Indiana marked our first GOOD show!!! People came, the promoters were nice and we met this really awesome chick Michelle who let us stay at her house and fed us and IV4K pizza hut in the morning! She also cut my hair into a mohawk!
- We are all getting really sick! Sean with his stomach and me with my throat! Uh-oh!
- Some huge dude in a Dead Kennedys shirt at the show in Indiana wanted to fight me! Oh no!
- Sean was told by Music-Go-Round that he could sell his amplifier and later on they changed their minds! Shit!
- I've been sober for two days! Awesome!
- The show in Ann Arbor, MI was awesome because it was sold out AND people knew the words to our songs! Totally rad!
- Stu Parnes of Ninjas/KnowHow/ASOBTUBA fame took us out after the show to find and crash parties. James Lynch broke an empty 40 at one of them! WHOOPS!!!
That's all i can think of right now. That and my being afraid of freight trains.
Wow... what a strange past couple of days. This can't really get too long because I have to play in about an hour so here's what has happened.
- Troy from IV4K is easily nicer than anyone we have ever met. He let us stay in his house, took us out to bars and gave me his 7-layer burrito to name a couple of the wonderful things he's done!
- Indiana marked our first GOOD show!!! People came, the promoters were nice and we met this really awesome chick Michelle who let us stay at her house and fed us and IV4K pizza hut in the morning! She also cut my hair into a mohawk!
- We are all getting really sick! Sean with his stomach and me with my throat! Uh-oh!
- Some huge dude in a Dead Kennedys shirt at the show in Indiana wanted to fight me! Oh no!
- Sean was told by Music-Go-Round that he could sell his amplifier and later on they changed their minds! Shit!
- I've been sober for two days! Awesome!
- The show in Ann Arbor, MI was awesome because it was sold out AND people knew the words to our songs! Totally rad!
- Stu Parnes of Ninjas/KnowHow/ASOBTUBA fame took us out after the show to find and crash parties. James Lynch broke an empty 40 at one of them! WHOOPS!!!
That's all i can think of right now. That and my being afraid of freight trains.
9.24.2004
9.23.2004
9.22.04 – 6:24 PM Toledo, OH.
Akron, akron, akron.
Where do we begin with this Akron show.
I woke up and that dog Hobason was pissing on the wall. We had a few errands to run which I don’t remember too well. These errands must have consisted of playing a baritone guitar for way too long. We were totally psyched to play Akron again logically:
- the last show did quite well
- we know the owner of the venue
- someone Imed me for the past three weeks letting me know we had a place to crash
So all the factors were in there for a kickass show, plus the dudes from Six Plus One were playing and we hadn’t seen them in a while. We showed up and immediately Chris from Orange Street starts talking politics with me. Who are you voting for? I’m not voting for president! What’s the problem? What’s the solution? KERRYBUSHKERRYKERRYNADERBUSHKERRY. Eventually we somehow ended another seemingly interminable conversation, as most election-themed conversations are these days and we made our way to CVS to buy some beer and then play a show.
What didn’t we factor into our psyched logic?
- It’s a weeknight during the school year
- There were only four bands playing
- Why play last when you’ve only played there once?
By the time we hit the stage I counted around 5 non-band members/girlfriends of band members. We still played our asses off, going into “American Idiot” by Green Day while checking our instruments which, well, we really don’t know it but three chords are easy enough. My problem was the hole in the stage directly behind me and the pole directly in front of me on the stage. That and several Taco Bell meals were starting to make us sick. The sickness continued for me well after the show when I passed out in a booth and the Eat ‘n Park when we were hanging out with Chris after the show. This was the start of me getting actually sick, something that kept me passed out in the van just about until noon the next day. I know that when we showed up to Chris’s jernt there was a huge barking dog that scared the shit out of me. I tried to make some phone calls outside but there was no service in Ohio.
At 8:00 in the morning Chris woke all of us up and kicked us off of his lawn where we were sleeping in our van in fear of dogs. We had to be at the Toledo show at 5:00 for load-in and I made it my bet that even though we would be arriving in Toledo at 11:00 AM we would still find a way to procrastinate enough to be late to the show itself. After 4 rest stops on a three hour drive I knew I should have bet money on this.
Our first stop in Toledo was at a Rite-Aid to get directions to a record store to buy the new Green Day and to a Starbucks so we could get some wireless internet and do some booking. The best we could do was a Barnes and Noble/Starbucks Café and a Circuit City. I thought that this was cool because I had left a book called The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime at home and I got a chance to read basically the whole thing for free while we waiting to go to the show. Then we had to go to a record store to consign CDs, stop by a music store to see if Sean could buy a Fender Bassman and go to a Western Union to get money wired to James. After getting lost several times in all directions for many miles, we managed to get to the venue around 5:30. CHECK TOMORROW FOR THE NEXT INSTALLLLMENT!!!
9.23.04 – 2:34 PM, Madison, WI
We showed up at the venue and it turned out it didn’t matter that we were late to this Toleldo Show. The band Kickstand had cancelled because the AKAs were playing with them on Saturday and their drummer couldn’t get off work for both shows. Here is a template for things you should not do if you are booking two bands from out of town if you would like to continue being a good promoter even though your band cancelled.
- Do not tell the bands playing “Yeah, there were going to be people here but now I’m not so sure… our band dropped off the show, so we told our friends that we aren’t playing so they won’t be coming.”
- Do not put a giant sign at the door that says “Kick-stand will NOT be playing!”
- Do not put a pile of flyers next to the sign that advertises your upcoming show with a more famous band.
- When people come to the show do not say “Hey, Kickstand aren’t playing. They’re playing Saturday instead.”
- Do not follow that by handing them a flyer.
- Do not describe the show as “yeah, I mean two touring bands are playing, so I don’t know” as an attendee is handing you money for the show.
- If a band had been in town a few months before with a big tour that had hundreds of people, maybe mention that.
- Please fuck off.
So, surprise surprise… not too many people were at the show… there was this cool chick, Katie Ferguson who showed up to the show. We met her at the Barnes and Nobles earlier and like people had done before, she promised to go to the show. Yeeeeah. Surrrre. But, no shit, she was there. There were like ten to fifteen other people there and we didn’t play very well. Dave and I were both sick and towards the end of the set we were choking down our coffee-taco lunches from earlier on.
As we were loading out sick as hell, we realized that JT had left the light on in the back of the van, so the van would not start. I Voted For Kodos tried to jump us but it would not work for a while. To top it all off, we received word at the beginning of the day that our Cleveland show the next day was totally cancelled. This warrants another list:
1) The promoters of the show do not want people to go to the show.
2) Our show in Cleveland is cancelled
3) Dave and I are sick.
4) The van is dead.
The I Voted For Kodos guys and us both agreed that we needed a day to just hang out and end the shit luck of the first couple of days of our tour/last couple of days of theirs. So after Rick made a couple of the most dangerous two-hundred seventy degree turns I’ve ever seen, we followed them to Madison, WI where there was no vegetarian food en route other than fries and a wonderfully bare house of IV4K’s drummer to sleep in. We just woke up this morning and we’re about to head out to the streets of Madison to try to get laid, flyer, but mostly try to get laid.
Akron, akron, akron.
Where do we begin with this Akron show.
I woke up and that dog Hobason was pissing on the wall. We had a few errands to run which I don’t remember too well. These errands must have consisted of playing a baritone guitar for way too long. We were totally psyched to play Akron again logically:
- the last show did quite well
- we know the owner of the venue
- someone Imed me for the past three weeks letting me know we had a place to crash
So all the factors were in there for a kickass show, plus the dudes from Six Plus One were playing and we hadn’t seen them in a while. We showed up and immediately Chris from Orange Street starts talking politics with me. Who are you voting for? I’m not voting for president! What’s the problem? What’s the solution? KERRYBUSHKERRYKERRYNADERBUSHKERRY. Eventually we somehow ended another seemingly interminable conversation, as most election-themed conversations are these days and we made our way to CVS to buy some beer and then play a show.
What didn’t we factor into our psyched logic?
- It’s a weeknight during the school year
- There were only four bands playing
- Why play last when you’ve only played there once?
By the time we hit the stage I counted around 5 non-band members/girlfriends of band members. We still played our asses off, going into “American Idiot” by Green Day while checking our instruments which, well, we really don’t know it but three chords are easy enough. My problem was the hole in the stage directly behind me and the pole directly in front of me on the stage. That and several Taco Bell meals were starting to make us sick. The sickness continued for me well after the show when I passed out in a booth and the Eat ‘n Park when we were hanging out with Chris after the show. This was the start of me getting actually sick, something that kept me passed out in the van just about until noon the next day. I know that when we showed up to Chris’s jernt there was a huge barking dog that scared the shit out of me. I tried to make some phone calls outside but there was no service in Ohio.
At 8:00 in the morning Chris woke all of us up and kicked us off of his lawn where we were sleeping in our van in fear of dogs. We had to be at the Toledo show at 5:00 for load-in and I made it my bet that even though we would be arriving in Toledo at 11:00 AM we would still find a way to procrastinate enough to be late to the show itself. After 4 rest stops on a three hour drive I knew I should have bet money on this.
Our first stop in Toledo was at a Rite-Aid to get directions to a record store to buy the new Green Day and to a Starbucks so we could get some wireless internet and do some booking. The best we could do was a Barnes and Noble/Starbucks Café and a Circuit City. I thought that this was cool because I had left a book called The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime at home and I got a chance to read basically the whole thing for free while we waiting to go to the show. Then we had to go to a record store to consign CDs, stop by a music store to see if Sean could buy a Fender Bassman and go to a Western Union to get money wired to James. After getting lost several times in all directions for many miles, we managed to get to the venue around 5:30. CHECK TOMORROW FOR THE NEXT INSTALLLLMENT!!!
9.23.04 – 2:34 PM, Madison, WI
We showed up at the venue and it turned out it didn’t matter that we were late to this Toleldo Show. The band Kickstand had cancelled because the AKAs were playing with them on Saturday and their drummer couldn’t get off work for both shows. Here is a template for things you should not do if you are booking two bands from out of town if you would like to continue being a good promoter even though your band cancelled.
- Do not tell the bands playing “Yeah, there were going to be people here but now I’m not so sure… our band dropped off the show, so we told our friends that we aren’t playing so they won’t be coming.”
- Do not put a giant sign at the door that says “Kick-stand will NOT be playing!”
- Do not put a pile of flyers next to the sign that advertises your upcoming show with a more famous band.
- When people come to the show do not say “Hey, Kickstand aren’t playing. They’re playing Saturday instead.”
- Do not follow that by handing them a flyer.
- Do not describe the show as “yeah, I mean two touring bands are playing, so I don’t know” as an attendee is handing you money for the show.
- If a band had been in town a few months before with a big tour that had hundreds of people, maybe mention that.
- Please fuck off.
So, surprise surprise… not too many people were at the show… there was this cool chick, Katie Ferguson who showed up to the show. We met her at the Barnes and Nobles earlier and like people had done before, she promised to go to the show. Yeeeeah. Surrrre. But, no shit, she was there. There were like ten to fifteen other people there and we didn’t play very well. Dave and I were both sick and towards the end of the set we were choking down our coffee-taco lunches from earlier on.
As we were loading out sick as hell, we realized that JT had left the light on in the back of the van, so the van would not start. I Voted For Kodos tried to jump us but it would not work for a while. To top it all off, we received word at the beginning of the day that our Cleveland show the next day was totally cancelled. This warrants another list:
1) The promoters of the show do not want people to go to the show.
2) Our show in Cleveland is cancelled
3) Dave and I are sick.
4) The van is dead.
The I Voted For Kodos guys and us both agreed that we needed a day to just hang out and end the shit luck of the first couple of days of our tour/last couple of days of theirs. So after Rick made a couple of the most dangerous two-hundred seventy degree turns I’ve ever seen, we followed them to Madison, WI where there was no vegetarian food en route other than fries and a wonderfully bare house of IV4K’s drummer to sleep in. We just woke up this morning and we’re about to head out to the streets of Madison to try to get laid, flyer, but mostly try to get laid.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)